Let’s get this out of the way…
I’m not going to be politically correct here. I’m not going to be nice just for the sake of being nice. If you want someone to apologize or to hold your hand and walk you through your life, then look elsewhere. I’m not going to feel sorry for you.
If you’re reading this, and you’re fat (odds are you are), this blog will either piss you off and out of anger you will go eat something, or it will make you think twice the next time you go looking for those ho-ho’s.
My inspiration for this blog is mostly to vent my incredible frustration with the world’s new-found fascination with “Solving” the obesity epidemic. Whether it’s in the form of a new diet, or a scientist has discovered yet another gene that is “responsible” for people stuffing their faces massive weight gain, or some company has released a new magic pill, almost all of it is just a bunch of bullshit. And what’s happening despite all of the millions spent on research? People are fatter than ever.
Everyone is just ignoring the fact that people are just less active today compared to 30+ years ago, and that their diets are MUCH worse. There’s no mystery to solve.
These people that blame their genetics, or those that point their pudgy fingers at fast food restaurants, are not taking responsibility for their own actions. They’re just making excuses, and blaming anything and everyone but themselves.
You may find my writing to be harsh, tactless, without compassion, and very negative at times. The reason for this is because the people I write about frustrate me immensely. Here’s why:
There are countless blogs, websites, and other resources out there that offer seemingly endless positive support for people looking to make a change in their life for the better. It kills me that there are so many people that complain about their situation, but do nothing about it. They don’t take advantage of the tools that are easily accessible to them. I believe some of these people just need to be kicked in the ass, and to have some strong emotions drawn from them. My blog just happens to do that sometimes. It also draws out a sense of humor from some. I believe no matter what situation in life you are in, you have to have a sense of humor about it.
Ultimately, despite my harsh tone and incredibly demeaning banter, I hope to enlighten a few people, and open their eyes to some truthiness behind all the confusing bullshit being thrown at us about obesity, health issues, and our rapidly depreciating diet.
I have to be sincerely honest and please know I have been where you currently are. But with that said, a few tragic events took place in my life which actually changed my physical appearance….So here’s my little story…I am an Identical twin, and I have lived a good 46 years of life. I have a daughter who is 5’10 and a Runway Model…She is stunning and I adore her..I also have a Brialliant son, who is not a Runway Model, but an Engineer. My story started out that I always did the typical 2 to 3oo sit ups every day, cut the grass and worked like there was no tomorrow!! I was very slender and people would comment, “You got to put some weight on, your too skinny!” I would raise my eyebrow and say “Obviously Your Blind!” Then I began noticing some physical changes. I began to put on the weight and became extremely tired, But hey I kept up my home and did ALL the outside chores so my husband wouldn’t need to….I knew something was wrong, so I went to see one dr after another and another. Within only a couple months, I had put on 50 WHOPPPPPPING pounds. I hated how I felt and I HATED how I looked…I was embarrassed beyond words…I prayed, I ate even LESS food than I had prior….Finally after five months, I was told that my Thyroid was 100% non- functional…..I needed to go on medication….I felt with the medication, the weight would begin to go off as I continued to PUSH myself, but in fact I still gained weight…For me 150 pounds was more than Fat….it was DISGUSTING!!!! And it had invaded my Life without my asking for it…..To add insult to Injury, I began passing out, after being Rushed to the Hospital, they told me I needed Emergency Surgery…My heart was not working right, and during the surgery my heart stopped.
The Doctors told me I had a condition known as Sudden Death Syndrome, I was NO LONGER allowed to do ALL things that I wanted to do, as a matter of fact a year after being diagnosed, my brother died from the SAME condition…
So here I am totally Bed Ridden, have been for over 5 LONG Years…Like yourself I can tell ANYONE how to Lose weight, after all I was once just like my beautiful daughter, slender and lean. I dressed the part and NEVER complained about having to work….So WHY am I writing this to you…..Because I NEVER made any excuses….even on the thread mill, I’d walk until my heart couldn’t take it anymore.
I dare say, if you had to live this Life, you’d probly end your life and as a Christian that is NOT something I agree with.
It is really easy to Judge another, Until you walk in their shoes…..Ohhhhhh and one other thing, my identical twin is as Skinny as a Rail….She doesn’t have the condition to contend with, but it’s a Daily Reminder of what I once was and I MISS that….So at 46 I do get Upset when I see people STUFF their faces full of FOOD and do nothing when they Can…But for a few of us, God wanted to Humble us enough to show us how Vain I once was.
Please don’t just asume that people are ALL FAT because they LOVE their food….Some actually have a legit reason, for me, I have had my heart stop twice and my kids have had to deal with a mother who can no longer enjoy going out and doing things with them….You can’t put a price tag on that….So as you would say some of us are just full of BS, but I can one day stand before God and yes even You and prove to you and to many others, that living this way has been a Nightmare and not something I would wish upon anyone, even including you….May you Always have your Health and may you one day see those who may not have their health in a different light…Take good care and try not to judge others so much, after all YOU have been Blessed more than you could ever know…..
Truthtold: Thank you for your comment. You are correct, I can’t imagine experiencing what you have gone through. Fortunately, neither can most people, because your kind of disorder is quite rare. Have you ever asked your doctor how common your problem is? From what I have read, thyroid problems occur in less than 10% of people (most of which are so mild people don’t even know they have a problem), and problems of your severity occur in only a fraction of those people.
While your story is interesting, you obviously are the exception to the rule, and I am not talking about you, or anyone that has a real disorder. Although I do speak in absolutes a lot, I don’t always, and please read all of my posts to find that out. I believe it would be incredibly un-interesting to read a blog that always had to have a disclaimer at the end of every sentence.
You obviously agree with me on some level by saying this: “So at 46 I do get Upset when I see people STUFF their faces full of FOOD and do nothing when they Can”. These are the people I am talking about. Don’t you also get angry when people claim it’s genetic, but you know that most likely they’re just making an excuse, when there are people like you that actually have a problem? They are making you look bad!! I hope that since you have been afflicted with this disorder, that you have taken the time to read all you can about it. That you have educated yourself. However, in doing so, I hope that you do not believe only what you want to hear.
As you are evidence to, my blog draws much emotion from some people. This was my intent from the beginning. There are countless ways to discuss this “epidemic”, and most of those ways, I have found, are very apologetic, and take too many peoples feelings into consideration. I simply chose to have a very straight forward point of view, and to not tip-toe around so as not to offend some people. I believe that if I were to be too nice, that my blog would not get the results that I intend to get. For some overweight people, the only way that you can get to them is to draw a strong emotion out of them, even if it is a negative one.
P.S. I like your posts about the dangers of beef, and 9-11 conspiracies. Pretty crazy stuff!
Actually, hypothyroidism is much more common than many people assume. It’s often under-diagnosed in most women over 35 because doctors are trained to give women approaching mid-life the “you are pre-menopausal, and weight gain is to be expected, get over it” speech. I was in my mid-twenties, lived a HIGHLY active youth, lived on a diet of 900 very meticulously counted calories for several years after high school, and suddenly had the same experience as the woman above. Here’s an example of my supposedly face-stuffing, ho-ho munching lifestyle: 900 calories per day, no excuses, 1 hour of intense aerobic workout every day, rain-sun-shine-summer through winter routine, no excuses – lifted weights and did some Pilades. I weighed 125 with a heavy body frame at 5-6 tall. EVERYONE tried to feed me whenever they saw me. Fast forward to age 24, and suddenly, I have no energy, constantly cold, never felt happy, etc, etc. gained 50 lbs in a year. I got checked and BINGO, I learned I was mildly hypothyroid.
NOW, I go for a 5-mile a night walk, outside (no treadmill because yes, treadmills really cut down on your actual calories burned, fyi) eat reasonably, no massive snacks, etc etc. and I’m still considered “fat” by most men. Like the lady above, I used to think 150 was ABSOLUTELY unacceptable for someone who isn’t, like, maybe close to six feet. I now wish I could just hit that mark and maintain it, but my body resists. I don’t eat anything with HFCS anymore, because they sneak it into your food – yes, I read labels, even now, as a “fat person.” I cook all my family’s meals, and shun refined sugar like the plague. So, to see your rather judgmental attitude in the manner you lump all overweight people together sickens me, when I know that every day my knees and feet hurt, that I probably do more exercise than most skinny people, while only seeing perhaps a quarter of the results, IF THAT. I, like the lady above used to have this same mentality, so be careful, sir – karma is, as they say, a b!tch – I’ve learned my lesson the hard way, but you can’t dodge genetics forever, either.
Thank You for being so Honest:) Seriously I have been written about and my medical condition has also been published in the New England Journal of Medicine….As far as knowning as much about my condition, well I have Lived Longer with this condition than anyone else ever recorded.
And Yes you are CORRECT I can’t Stand seeing people eating at those Buffet Resturants, or viewing young kids who are soooo young walking out of a fast food joint easily weighing over 200 pounds!!!!
But because of what I have gone through on a personal level I may have more compassion for those, who really can’t Help it!!!!
Because as you stated, the MAJORITY of Fat people choose to LIVE that way and honestly that to me is a SIN….
I cannot imagine as I write this how the weather outside must have felt today….Because I was unable to get up and go outside to enjoy that Fresh Air….
My heart yearns for that…..sighs……My wonderful husband of 25 years went golfing this morning and YES I was jealous, but let him have a wonderful time out…
In truth I apprecite your Honesty and your blog NEEDS to be there, because some people who can STILL CHANGE their lives and Should, can perhaps get the Motivation to go out and do something , rather than sitting down in front of a TV and eating a bag of Chips…..
When Nice doesn’t work anymore, you have to do what you have felt lead to do…Like you said NO TIP toeing around the topic.
By the way the Story about the two women at work was pretty amusing, I can’t remember the last time I have been to a Vending machine, at least Ten Years.
Here’s some news that should make you feel all better…
Mexico is GAINING Ground on Obesity and may now be a few people away from being called, “The Fatest Nation!”
Ohhhh, you should read the Gentically altered foods post I have up….It’s pretty sad that much of the food consumed has some form of treatment on it…I wouldn’t be surprised if that could potentially hurt people..
Oh and one more thing, This Country is starting to wake up again, they are beginning to Pass New Laws so Physical Education is brought back into the School System and I think that will help MANY of the younger ones out in their weight issues.
Ok, I got to get busy, take good care and keep writing.
Truth Be Told….
Thank you for your recent comments on my blog. I’m sorry I was not able to approve them, but you included the URL here to your blog, which is not a friendly site for those I hope will feel safe and comfortable reading and participating on my blog.
I just started the blog last week, so that’s why the lack of comments. I appreciate your suggestions to improve my blog, but my blog stats are already quite positive, so I think I’ll just keep following my instincts.
Thank you for reading.
PS. Excuse me for leaving 2 comments, but I also wanted to mention I’ve specified my comment policy in my “About” section, so it will be clear going forward.
Do you really think you’re going to make fat people “normal sized” with your blog? I’m sincerely curious. If you think that someone’s going to “think twice” before they pick up a twinky just from reading your blog, you are very naive!
My guess is that you’re using it as a venting ground. And I totally understand that.
I also wonder if you had a mother that was an overbearing slave driver that was fat or any family members you grew up with that were fat that were total assholes. It’s curious for me because for the life of me, I can’t understand why fat people should make others so angry – even if they are lying to make themselves feel better. I feel the same way about gay people. I don’t know why gays cause so much anger? Oh, I am a lesbian too, so that’s why I stick up for gays.
Despite popular belief, fat people are happy people. (I’m fat – REALLY fat – so I know!!) People make choices. Fat people choose to be fat despite their claims that they have no idea how they got to be that way. (Psst… I lie like this too sometimes, but it’s only to stir the pot hehe.)
Researchers in the medical field all over the world focus on us fatties … for what? What a waste of time and money that just goes right down the drain. To think they are convincing us fatties that there could be a psychological or physiological reason for being gross is preposterous. And I’m not being sarcastic. They are so lame. And they don’t help us. They hurt us in that they belittle how truly happy we are and how truly convenient our lives are.
I am 660 some pounds and I’ve never felt better in my life. There are so many people who are obsessed with fat people, write books about my people, make TV shows about us, blog about my people, research my people on the web, dream about my people, stare at my people that I got jealous of all the attention that fat people were getting. So, I made a choice to start eating more. And it worked. I went from being 125 lbs to 660 in just a few years. I am now morbidly obese, and getting all the attention that I’ve always wanted.
I know your attention to us is negative, but it’s still attention!! Negative attention works. How do you think celebrities get where they are?! We fat people love this. We don’t mind getting spat at in the street, or receiving the names people call us or even kicks in the ass. We may bicker at you every once in a while, but deep down inside, we are smiling.
Here’s some trivia for you. Most fat people have a liking to BDSM. Seriously. We don’t feel pain like others do, and if we do, we LOVE it. Actually, if you ask me, I think we fatties are tougher than the average Joe. We don’t need YOUR helping hand. We get quite enough attention and love from everyone that we get by just fine. Why do you think the fat epidemic is getting so commonplace all over the world? Have you ever thought about this? It’s because we are happier! This is the common sense that I wish people like you would grow to understand.
It is so much more convenient being fat than slender. This is the best choice that I’ve ever made for myself. Life is so much easier now, it’s unbelievable. I don’t know why more people don’t choose to go in my direction. People are concerned about “health”? Gimmie a break. People smoke, drink, and do other horrible things to their bodies. Being fat really doesn’t cause that many physical problems at all. Trust me on this one. I am much happier than my slender counterparts. You know this too. Why else would people choose to be fat? Duh?! Hello? My heart is beating just fine. And if I die young, at least I went happy. Life is too short to worry about the petty things. Live each day as your last day. And never regret a thing. This is my philosophy.
My mother was a bitch and she was a chain smoker and an alcoholic, so as an adult I associate those who smoke and drink with my bitchy mom. People do this with the obese as well. They associate the grossly fatties with their own fat bitch whore of a mom and take all their anger out on other fatties. But I don’t care. We fatties are attention whores and have a thicker skin than you’d like to believe. Secretly, we laugh at you guys who spend your entire lives focused on us.
Really. WE ADORE being in the spotlight. xoxoxo 
I may actually even get a spot on a TV show or in a magazine. I am so thrilled about this. I’m still waiting to hear back from Oprah and the Murray show.
Because the media needs us, we can pocket $$$$ without having to get real work! Everyone should be doing this with me!!!!
We can take it, kiddo. Rock on with your blog.
Even as fat as I am, I get wet in my undies with all the attention you guys give to us. We fatties don’t always need penetration to get an orgasm. Sometimes just a little reminder that we are out there, is all we need to get us out of bed every day.
You get mad. But deep down inside you want to be us. We fatties know that others are jealous because, you have to admit it — who gets more attention? The slender or the obese? Duh. Obviously the obese. Don’t worry about your health. If you are happy, the rest takes care of itself.
All this health BS in the news related to fatties is just pure propaganda SCAM. In all actuality, we are HEALTHIER than the slender. Ask any fat person. Just as the research on how fatness is “genetic” so is the same research that says that we will become “unhealthy”. It BOGUS. Trust me. And it’s a big joke, too.
I love your blog, and I will subscribe. Rock on, babe. xoxoxox
Oh, by the way, to all those from Canada, move to the US. It’s so much easier here to be fat. So is Australia and Mexico, but I chose the US to live because they have more fat clubs!
Greetings, Intolerant Earthling,
Zontar, impartial observer of behavior and life alighted upon your blog and thought it was most curious. It struck Zontar as strangely curious that you would devote an entire blog to the subject of obesity. As this condition is unknown on my planet it got Zontar to wondering about your motivation.
Zontar has concluded that you are most likely morbidly obese yourself and trying to make everyone who reads your venom think that you must be skinny yourself. Why else would someone devote their life to the ridicule of perfect strangers who just happen to be overweight?
Another conclusion Zontar has reached is that your penis is microscopically small and by concentrating on another person’s handicapped it will deflect attention away from your miniscule member.
Zontar also knows that you are very likely homosexual. Not that there is anything wrong with that. Zontar careth not where any individual likes to insert their member. The bad part of being homosexual is being in denial about it and taking all the self loathing out on obese people.
Zontar further concludes that your mother and father most likely detest you and with good reason. If I were your father I wouldn’t like you either.
With that said, Zontar congratulates you on a perfectly insipid and pointless blog. Zontar would like to be friends with you. Zontar loves all mankind.
Hail bigoted, pea-brained Earthling!
Hail Zontar!!
I feel like I’ve just been probed and/or psychoanalyzed yet again.
I don’t even know how to respond to either of you.
Ok well those last 2 are jst crazy. freaking aliens, wtf..? I don’t personally care if you are fat skinny or a midget, but I love your blog. I bookmarked it and have a poster above my computer to tell me to check it every day- the reason for that being is that YES PEOPLE ARE TOO NICE about saying that you are overweight! I’m 5’8 and just under 200lbs right now, the problem with that is I don’t LOOK overweight, however I have gotten extremely complacent and out of shape because everyone still sugarcoats it and tells me I look great and am beautiful!
I find it extremely helpful having a website I can read for 15 mins a day and all I want to do is go to the gym afterwards~ Yes I do think that the idea of what is sexy/model type is unrealistic for most people, unless they are bulimic/anorexic, or just born like that- which a large part of my family is so definitely not genetics! However, I do think that to be healthy you should be able to do everything you want to do- including sports, being active, and fitting into clothes in any store!
Now that I can’t do that i’ve been searching for motivation to get back into shape so I can do all those things again! (I just had a baby THIS MONTH, so I understand seeing people that could be in shape, because i’m already back at the gym running and sweating my butt off, but others try to use having children as an excuse)
Anyways, if people don’t want to read your website because its offensive then go to a different one it’s super easy. I have posters up to motivate me because being nice about your weight is not going to CHANGE it!! If you don’t think that there’s a problem, you’re going to stay the same, or get FATTER!! So keep it up, I am extremely motivated by your website, and it helps me not make the excuses that I made before, which is how I got overweight in the first place!
[...] Fat Mission [...]
I stumbled upon this blog today through the Health blog on the NY Times website, and I will admit that my first reaction was to get pissed off. I’m resisting that reaction, however, so we can have a civil discussion (because those rock).
I am 22 years old, 5’5.5″ tall (I am, really, and I’ll fight you for that half inch
), weigh somewhere between 210-220 lbs (although everyone I’ve ever told my weight can’t believe it’s actually that high), and wear a size 18/20. I know I’m overweight–obese, actually, if you go by BMI. I know I should lose weight. I know what I’m supposed to do: “eat right and exercise.”
I know all these things, and yet…it doesn’t happen. Because for me, it’s like it is for smokers. They “just” need to stop smoking, right? It’s easy to say, but SO much harder to put into practice. I know I should “eat right” (which seems to mean SO many things to so many people), and I am trying to eat more vegetables, but I still love cheese and tortilla chips and desserts. I know I should exercise, but for the past few days when my alarm has gone off 1.5 hours early so I can go to my apartment complex’s gym (because I think I’m even less likely to go in the evening), I end up turning it off, because that extra sleep is just way too tempting. I’m not excusing my actions–I know that’s not the right thing to do. But like I said before, knowing and doing are two entirely different things, and until I either somehow pull together the willpower or find something that can drag myself out of bed…I feel like I’m stuck.
I’m also a bit stuck because of my lack of knowledge. At this point in my life I’m on my own in the food department, without a college meal plan (although I am going back to school this fall for my masters degree). And while I’m finding that I do enjoy cooking, it’s a daunting and slightly overwhelming uphill climb. I know I should be eating more vegetables, but right now I’m limited to what I feel comfortable using, which is pretty much onions, bell peppers, lettuce, and potatoes. I got some baby eggplant and beets at the grocery today on impulse, but I have no idea how to use them, and many other veggies. How do I cook them? Do they even need cooked at all? What are they good in? And, importantly, can they be a part of a packed lunch, because at the work I’m doing this summer, and when I’m back on campus this fall, unless I want to grab some fast food I’m going to have to rely on a packed lunch that can be eaten cold, as I won’t have access to microwaves or anything like that between classes. So I usually fall back on a sandwich and Sun Chips, which I’m sure isn’t my best option, but I don’t know what else to pack.
And, like I said before, it seems like everyone has a different idea of what is healthy. Atkins, the Zone, Mediterranean style, low-fat, low-carb, no meat, no grains…it’s enough to make my head spin. For example, plain water isn’t my favorite beverage, so at meals I usually drink Coke Zero, since it has no calories. No, people say. Soft drinks are bad. So I got some fruit juices and flavored waters. Wrong again, I’m sure some people would say–too much sugar. And I’m sure others would jump all over my skim milk too. So I’ve been trying some different green teas (although those seem to have lots of sugar too), but I’m finding that I just don’t care for tea that much. So in the end, I go back to my Coke Zero. Does that make me a bad person? Should I force myself to drink only water, even though I don’t like it?
I keep telling myself that this is the time I’m going to start losing weight, but there’s so much conflicting information out there that I feel like I’m going in circles and/or banging up against a wall. That, combined with my lack of cooking knowledge and apparent lack of willpower, and I’m doomed before I even start.
And this has now gotten way too long, so I’m going to wrap this up and post it–and hope that I’m not eviscerated too severely.
Dude,
I’m going to start this comment off with the fact that I am thin. I am not saying that out of pride or a sense of superiority, but it seems that in your disturbed view, it is extremely relavent. Where do you get off being so judgmental? Maybe some people eat too much. Have you no faults? When you write that you get “the shivers” as a result of someone else’s weight, I get really concerned about your mental health. Oh, and btw, I am a licensed mental health professional. My suggestions to you: take some deep breaths, stop worrying about/trying to control other people, and find something meaningful to do with your own life. And for god’s sake, just lighten up buddy!!!
Dude,
1. Do you know what a blog is?
2. You are so not a licensed mental health professional.
3. My suggestion to you: clear your schedule, because you’ve got a lot of comments to write on a lot of blogs that have content where the author(s) write their opinions on topics that concern them so that other people that may be interested in said topics can read them.
Hi, I’m fat, and I really like your blog. I write a blog every morning to keep myself motivated and reasonably honest about my own efforts to get in shape and loose the weight. Part of my morning ritual is some light surfing of wordpress to see who else is having some success or similar struggles. When I stumbled across your blog, I was prepared to be a bit offended, maybe a bit angry, but I’m not. In fact, I think it’s (and I haven’t read all of it yet) reasonably well written, not without a sense of irony and not entirely lacking compassion.
Perhaps I’m friendly to your blog because I’m not one of the ones that has trouble walking. I did however reach a size 20 at my heaviest, and had to ask myself why exactly I was not doing something about it. I thought “it’s not like the dangers of obesity are not well publicized”, being and staying fat was my choice, a passive one, but a choice I made.
I actually think your blog has an important message and that is about choice and how we make our choices. I think every fat person has that moment when they feel it was not their choice. Maybe it was because your parents didn’t choose well when you were a child and so you were “always fat”, or maybe it was a bout with illness… In my case it was a bike accident that broke my shoulder, three ribs, hip and knee. Six months of surgeries, 18 months of rehab, and still eating like I was playing soccer every day I went from 135 lbs (5’10″) to 205 lbs. That sucked, but I could have choose to recognize the size increase, to eat less pasta, or get more nutritional information.
Once I was fat I tried to loose the weight over the next 4 years. In fact I lost 20 lbs… well actually probably 200 they were just the same 20 lbs over and over and over. This is because I chose to believe in fad diets, quick fixes, and stuff that really requires a power of suspended belief in reality to think that they would actually work…. This only resulted in me going from a size 16 and 205 lbs to however much I weighed when I hit a size 20 (never looked at the scale). The hard fact is as much as I didn’t “want” to be fat, to be fatter, what I “wanted” didn’t matter, what I chose to do did. My actions were me choosing to be fat, choosing to get fatter. I have no one to blame, but myself for those choices.
A favour: could you bold that bit about us being less active and our diets being MUCH worse.
Sure some people have rare health disorders that may not allow them to loose the weight but for most of us it is poor food choices, poor in the nutrient sense and poor in the quantity sense and a serious lack of exercise.
I bit the bullet 23 weeks ago and started a slow change. I slowly figured out how much I was eating a day and then worked to reduce that to a healthy weight loss range, I work with calorie counting and nutritional books (calorie counting alone is not the answer, but it helps to educate on portion control) and I slowly worked my way up from no exercise to 2 hours a day 4 days a week at the gym and other fun activities (dog walking, tennis, swimming) whenever I can fit them in.
I’m only 23 weeks in, I’m almost 30, and I’ve lost 6 sizes already and I’m not on any fad diet, crash diet, pill, paid-program or anything that I cannot control 100% myself. I simply took control of my food choices and I choose to get up and move. I can’t stress this enough all it is taking for me to loose weight is small changes in my food choices and activity level. Not rocket science.
While I don’t think all people (fat and thin alike) will respond well to this “tough love” approach I don’t think it is without merit. Some people do need to have their hands held, to have a kind tender word, and a shoulder to cry on. Admitting our failures and struggles is hard. However, sometimes we also need that “just do it”, get up and go, get on with it, what are you waiting for, hard push to stand on our own two feet (and move them). If there is anything I have learned in the last 23 weeks it is that while the hands, nice words and shoulders are nice, they can’t loose the weight for me, I need to do that.
Keep writing, I’ll be reading, and waiting for that dose of reality to keep me motivated to go all the way with my own personal challenge.
“There are countless blogs, websites, and other resources out there that offer seemingly endless positive support for people looking to make a change in their life for the better. It kills me that there are so many people that complain about their situation, but do nothing about it. They don’t take advantage of the tools that are easily accessible to them. You would think that they would. There must be some underlying reasons why these people choose not to make positive changes that would improve their life. ”
The answer to your question is that most (not all) fat people have an addiction to food. They have an eating disorder just like anorexia, only the oppositive or bulimia without the purging. You can offer them all of the enlightenment and information you want. Until they hit bottom or die, they will keep eating.
Here is a question for you…
Why are you so angry at food addicts, otherwise known as compulsive overeaters? Are you as mad at drug addicts and alcoholics? People with food addiction are suffering. They may not be able to admit they have a problem, much like alcoholics refuse to admit they drink to much. One is a liquid addiction and one is a solid addiction. They both cause pain for the addict and the people who love them. People can recover from food addiction if they are willing to do the work that it takes. First, they need to recognize it as an addiction.
Thanks for your comment.
First, I’m not angry at anyone. I am open to the idea that a large part of overweight people are food addicts, but I haven’t read enough sources that say this to make the assumption that most of them are.
An addiction is a behavioral problem, and is harder to pinpoint than an actual physical abnormality that causes weight gain. These abnormalities being what doctors and scientists all over the world are trying to find. Whether it’s genetic, hormonal, or disease related.
While it may seem that the eating habits of a very overweight person are the definition of addiction, and seem very similar to drug or alcohol addiction, there remains one major difference:
We all need food to survive, and everyone eats.
NO ONE needs abusive drugs or alcohol to survive.
Because drugs are not needed, it can be easy to point out an addict. But because food IS needed in varying degrees, it is harder to point out who is abusing their food intake.
That being said… I, again, am not opposed to the idea. Many people would say that it is not so hard to point out who abuses food, because fat people most likely eat more food than they need to survive (not to mention bad foods); But my only point is that there is a lot more grey area with labeling food addiction than drug addiction.
Finally, whether I would assume most overweight people are food addicts or not, I believe the problem of obesity affects much more people worldwide than drugs and alcohol. This is one reason why I choose to discuss this.
Thank you for responding to my comment.
I hope you will explore the topic of food addiction further.
It is an epidemic and the addiction aspect is often not discussed. Many people think that being addict to food is better than drugs or alcohol. The truth is that it is a death sentence. People self medicate with food much like other substances. The “bad” foods you refer to often contain sugar, fat, white flour, caffeine. Google food addiction, compulsive overeating and recovery and you will find a whole world of information you can bring to your readers. There is help out there for those who want it. Living life in a heavy and uncomfortable body along with a pre-occupation with food is filled with suffering for the people who are fat and the people who love them. It does not have to be that way. The first step is admitting you have a problem.
Hello,
We all have a tendency to find disgust in certain things. We as people are idiosyncratic that way.
The shit that makes my face contort and resemble the same look as if someone farted, are many. I would be lying if I said I didn’t find the morbidly obese “disgusting”. I do. But admitting that makes me uncomfortable.
But let’s take that one step further, I also find skeletally thin people to be equally difficult to look at.
Nor am I a fan of the shallow, the vain and the extremist in anything from politics, to lifestyle to religion.
I am 49 and after a near fatal accident in which I broke 13 pivotal bones, I now live in constant pain and restrictive movement. Because of that, my weight has ballooned and deflated many times over.
I now deal with some overweight issues due in part to lingering effects from the accident and damned metabolic changes due to menopause (and believe me, it DOES prompt changes) but I recently lost 35 pounds and I feel much, much better.
I encourage weight loss. It’s the only viable alternative and while I agree with your stance and your fire, I don’t necessarily agree with your approach. But this is your blog and you entitled to do with it what you will. That, I wholeheartedly support.
But I will say this: what you write is honest–painfully honest (from your perspective, anyway) and if someone can read your words and recognize themselves in them, then get mad and/or hurt enough to do something about their current situation, then I applaud it as the motivator it might be.
It all begins with us; it all begins within.
You’re a hell of a writer, by the way.
I’ll be back.
Best,
LK
Hi,
I’m fat too….240 lbs for a 17 year old? Ew…right? Anyway, I find your blog to be quite helpful. maybe its because seeing what people think of fatso’s makes me more motivated. Mind you, I go to the gym and work my ass off alot…pretty good. I don’t even eat that much…But clinical depression caused me to turn to comfort food, which got me here…and I am going to change it!
Instead of getting all pissed, fat people like me should take it as constructive critism and help it motivate them. And this helped hit the spot…I will lose weight and get POSITIVE attention…becuase who wants negative.
Thanks 4 writing this! I agree with you…:)
This is for honest fat accepters and mainstream fat people. We are fat by choice. Please fellow fatties stop apologizing for your gluttonous lives. Make food your god.
GLUTTONY IS SANITY!
Oh my god there are some REAL crazy mother f**kers commenting here. I congratulate you on your ability to get some really out there comments. Seriously. Congrats!!!!!
A reply to a comment from Fat_Melissa_from Vancouver: No one in my family or circle of friends can be considered fat. While I don’t hate fat people and could care less about what they feed themselves – it’s a little more than a pet peeve when I get SAT on riding the subway. Please don’t sit if you do FIT.
I am doing research on overweight people and I came across your site. I agree with you – most overweight people choose to be overweight. I workout and eat right 80% of the time to keep my weight at 126 pounds. If I didn’t do that I would be fat and out of shape too. But I work at it. Yes, I fall off the wagon at times but I weight myself often and put myself in check. I think most people are overweight because they are lazy and they don’t think enough of themselves to care. You all have excuses but you need to face the reality and get off the couch and work out and stop eating everything in sight. Losing weight is not easy, it’s hard work but you could do it if you really wanted to. If you are eating emotionally see a therapist, if you have a health problem see a doctor. Stop making excuses. Eat better, workout, be consistent and you can do it. Have faith in yourself.
Also, I don’t believe people want to be fat. It’s another excuse!
Yawn.
There are skinny people who eat Twinkies and Ho-Hos, drink gallons of soda, and are still slender. Subtract the cakes and you have me until age 21. I could literally eat or drink anything and not gain more than five pounds, and only five pounds, and that was it. My weight range was 130-135 on a 5’6″ frame and I’m medium-boned with wide hips so I carried it fine.
Then I went on the pill in 1995. Then I got pregnant later that year. On the pill I gained about ten pounds; when I had my first child my weight reset at around 175-180 and stayed there for years, with the exception of dropping down to around 160 during a couple of years that I was extremely stressed out and living on next to nothing. It could be noted that I ate less, but I had never been a huge eater to begin with, and at that point I was not getting adequate nutrients from what I did manage. I’m sure it didn’t help that I was donating plasma for grocery money because I was between jobs.
The next time I had a major weight gain was with my second child. Got back down to my reset pre-pregnancy weight of 180 and that lasted maybe three or four weeks, max. All of a sudden I regained all my pregnancy weight, with interest. The big change I underwent during that time was going vegan, and I was breastfeeding my daughter, too, which supposedly helps moms lose baby weight. Go figure.
Type 2 diabetes figures strongly on my mom’s side of the family; we have Native American ancestry with a corresponding poor tolerance of grains and sugars. (As in, my grandmother’s mother was full-blooded Cherokee or very nearly so, and Mawmaw qualifies to register with the tribe, if she has not already.) I have Native American ancestry on Dad’s side as well. With all of this in mind and having found Dr. Atkins’s books, I decided to try low-carbing. And it does work for me but undoing a lifetime of bad eating habits (some of which I had reason to believe were *good*, such as eating whole grains, since everyone from my stepmom to the national media to random doctors were telling me so!) takes some time, work, and patience. It is like quitting smoking. Rarely is a person successful on the first try. Likewise I have jumped on and off the wagon with proper eating. I am hoping my present efforts will be the last time I have to fight with this. It seems like much less of a fight this time around, at least, which is a good sign.
It’s possible I have thyroid issues on top of the other metabolic problems. Upon investigation I have found that hypothyroid seems to be an underdiagnosed condition and that many doctors gauge thyroid function solely by TSH values, which is not always an accurate measure. I had never gained that much weight that quickly as I did after my younger child was born, and I also experienced weird skin problems in the beginning, unexplained of course. I don’t have health insurance at this point so it may be some time before I have any idea what’s going on. If my current dietary efforts cease to be successful I’ll see what I can do about getting labwork done on my own dime. It’s expensive, so unfortunately that’s a last resort.
But it is important to note that I don’t think my obesity is the central problem. That’s just aesthetics. I don’t understand why people are making such a huge deal out of it when they don’t put up hate sites about people with red hair or green eyes or who are left-handed. You probably think “hate” is a strong word, even mock-worthy, but at bottom that’s what you’re doing, and so is everyone who comments here agreeing with you. You behave as though people like me pack on the pounds just to offend you personally. You should learn to be a bit less self-centered, if not for the sake of others than at least because it gets boring after a while. Try being someone who started out good-looking to the point that I was never without a date when I wanted one, and gradually becoming invisible and having people consider you subhuman. Maybe if you are ever disfigured in an automobile accident and have to observe random strangers glance at you and then quickly look away, you might have an idea.
Getting back to the point, the obesity isn’t the central problem. I have been having other signs of insulin resistance, and this is no joke; my mother was diagnosed at forty, and I’m thirty-five. Losing the weight will be a side-effect of compensating for the insulin resistance, nothing more, although of course I will be pleased to see both happen.
Because, y’know, I had no idea who you were until today, so certainly could not have packed on all this weight four years ago, and fourteen years ago, with the goal of irritating you foremost in my mind. I am sure that if any overweight person not on a self-hating spree comments here after me, they’ll tell you something similar.
Getting back to the smokers’ analogy, I have trouble understanding why *they* keep hurting themselves. Some of them do try to quit. Some of those succeed. Of those who aren’t trying, I have to assume they aren’t ready to quit, or they aren’t sure how to quit. Everyone is on a continuum with this if they have a bad habit to break. But obesity isn’t a habit. Eating might be, but there are slender people out there gorging themselves on chips and soda, and they gain no weight from it, or not enough to make them overweight. If obesity had a consistent cause across the board then there should be no slender people with bad habits. I suppose it is too much to ask to request that you reconsider your position but perhaps others will reconsider theirs.
And the only reason I am telling you all this is to offer up data for consideration. It actually is none of your business why I am overweight, and I owe you nothing in terms of losing it. And I am likely to be very annoyed if I get down to my goal weight and start getting attention from men again, too. I am the same person I was a hundred pounds ago. Same personality, same values, same skill in bed. If I have lost my personal worth because I happened to store energy in some of my cells, I’d rather not associate with people whose standards are that shallow.
[...] ran across this guy in a blogroll on a paleo-related blog. I’m not sure why the paleo guy linked to him, as [...]
[...] Fat Mission [...]
I just wanted to tell you I like how your website has become more focused on educating people and less on making fun of the morbidly obese. I am still hoping you will post some more about food addiction and treatment. Many people who do recover from morbid obesity do use the 12 steps, but they can not break their anonymity in the media, which is why you never read about it on the cover of People magazine. I was also hoping you might look into the success of cognitive behavior therapy and the morbidly obese. I think that changing negative eating behaviors is critical to recovering as well as learning to exerise. Everyone knows you need to eat less and move more. But not everyone knows what a healthy and balanced food plan is like and not everyone can identify specific situations or daily routines that need to be changed in order to recover. It is a process that requires work. If obese parents can change their behaviors and instill positive lifestyle habits to their children, their children are much less likely to suffer as their parents have. I believe this is the generation that needs to make drastic changes in lifestyle or the epidemic will continue. It is killing people everyday. I was also hoping you could research what the effect is on family members who have relatives of the morbidly obese. We know other addictions can tear a family apart. A person self-destructing with food is no different. I am really hoping our society is at a turning point. I look forward to watching this site evolve.
I am obese. On impulse upon finding this blog, I was angry, upset, blah, blah, blah.
However, I get it.
I’ve never known a healthy/normal weight and for the last 2 years I have been losing weight, slowly but surely. Being obese is disgusting, and is embarrassing, and any obese person out there who thinks otherwise is delusional. Can I control what I eat, yea. Do I? Most days, yes, I do. Let me tell you, when I look at what I used to eat in one meal, it sickens me. Now, I am satisfied with a nice leafy salad with a couple ounces of protein on it.
I cannot wait until I am not disgusting to look at anymore to others.
Oh, and hell yes, there are WAY too many excuses for being fat. Just shut the hell up and buy some vegetables for God’s sake! You wouldn’t believe the amazing flavors in fruits and veggies!
kudos LS for admitting it.
except for some people, i bet less the 5%, who have a serious medical problem, fatties are just making up ever shitty excuse possible… at least admit you’re just mindlessly stuffing yourself. it’s your body, your problem.
but don’t come with the fat acceptance shit, i’m totally healthy, being the size of 3 people is normal!
i’m all for body acceptance, and overweight acceptance…
but not obese, morbidly/super obese acceptance!!!!
i have PCOS of course i’m gonna be 300 pounds! no you’re not! it’s genetic, it runns i the family.. just because you have your dad’s bad teeth, do you stop brushing? if your kid has dyslexia, do you think to yourself “well, then why try to teach him to read, he doesn’t have to struggle to meet societies standard???” i guess not…
at least act like grown ups and own up to it, don’t act like fuckin babies.
I’m around 154. and it’s humiliating.
I’ve became a vegetarian, I go to the gym 5 days a week, and for a 2-3 mile bike ride every weekend. And After a month, I only lost 5 pounds.:(
A couple years back, I Even fell into anorexia Because I felt so bad about being overweight. and even within the month before I got help, I only lost 10 pounds.
I’ve never had a diagnosis. The doctor said It was just hard for me to lose weight was all.
Although, I’ve gotten alot stronger since, so I can still do All of the stuff I like.:)
But my appearance still gets me down alot.
Everybody shut up about thyroids.
Under-active thyroid is well understood and easily medicated.
THANK YOU! I’m so sick of fat people being molly-coddled.
To be honest, I’m still fat myself (10 lbs overweight) but I have lost 110 lbs in the last 2 years. It took me being sick of feeling like crap, and divorcing my ex-husband to get me off my ass, but once I started eating healthy and exercising, the weight started falling off.
Now I’m striving to get down to an all time low weight (for me) of 150lbs! I’m 5’9 and I used to weigh 280lbs. I don’t have any pictures from them.. Most of my pictures are from when I was 240lbs. Right now I’m sitting at 179.5 lbs and I’m so proud of myself. I have always been fat, and being at this weight is the “thinnest” I’ve ever been. It’s definitely not thin enough though.
I know that if I keep eating healthy and exercising I will get there. I just get so angry at people that ask me if I’m sick, doing drugs, using some “magic pill”, etc.. Yeah, it’s called HARD WORK.
People don’t know the meaning of the term anymore. They’re too interested in instant gratification and getting things as easily as possible.
I’m proud of the ex-fatties who decided to dedicate themselves to transforming their lives and bodies.
I’ve been overweight most of my life and I’ve gotten used to it. No room for improvement.
Good luck… I guess?
Thank you soooo much! Everyone I know keeps trying to make me eat eat eat that’s all they do and i was starting to listen to them until you reminded me not to cuz They’re just trying to make me fat like they are!
Thanks for helping me stay strong! I was weak and gross and now I’m a WHALE 93lbs, but hopefully if I stay strong, I’ll be back to 85 soon, and then my goal, 80!
CW: 93
CGW: 85
LW: 83
I’m gonna be strong, and stop bein gfat and disgusting!!!
“Health is not a virtue
While these behaviours may be useful, physical health is not the moral imperative it is made out to be. We live in an age where health is held to such high esteem that anyone who engages in unhealthy behaviour is seen as “bad”. That person, with their evil, doughnut-eating ways, becomes a scapegoat for all of society’s moral failings.
It’s crap. Eating a balanced diet and exercising regularly makes a person healthier, but it does not make them better. That’s because health is not a virtue. The behaviours associated with health are not always physically possible, and not always desired. ”
–Australian Cosmopolitan
I’m not a racist, but……….
I’m not a fat hater, but……
You guys are in much need of psychotherapy and are in as much denial as those you condemn. Do you ever sit and think what’s really bothering you underneath all those layers of ignorance?
In any event, I am curious as to if all these years of “research” has “helped” you discover why fat people are so fat as the http address of your blog asks? Have you achieved your desired effects? If not, how many years do you think it will take? Who will win this war? Your people or the “molly-coddled” fatties?
I’ll leave you with some wisdom. All I know is that truly happy people don’t have time to worry about other people’s problems. I’m only saying this as I’m sincerely worried about your health and your people’s impact on society.
“It kills me that there are so many people that complain about their situation, but do nothing about it. They don’t take advantage of the tools that are easily accessible to them. I believe some of these people just need to be kicked in the ass…”
Yep. This is me, and in more areas than diet/fitness. I just found your blog today. It’s bracing! I believe your humor is compassionate at its core. I’ll keep reading. Thank you.
Because mocking and belittling people into changing their bad habits always works…
Wonderful post but I was wanting to know if you could write a litte more on this subject? I’d be very grateful if you could elaborate a little bit more. Cheers!
Hiya! Quick question that’s totally off topic. Do you know how to make your site mobile friendly? My blog looks weird when browsing from my iphone4. I’m trying to find a template or plugin that might be able to correct this issue. If you have any suggestions, please share. With thanks!
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